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Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Can you tell me..


How many fools...
written by Just K

does it take to allow a completely worthless song to make it to the radio? Have you ever heard a totally pathetic excuse for music and wondered, who let this happen?! Well, I have no way of actually finding out, but I sure can speculate. So here’s the scenario:

Young Blinga is working on what’s supposed to be his next hit single entitled “Shinin’ at Nite (Moon on My Chain). Convinced that this song is gonna be the bomb diggity off the title alone, he calls in a favor to get a fellow rapper, J3W3L$ (sadly, pronounced jewels) on the track. The two rappers get together at a studio owned by the song’s producer in order to create magic. Let’s see how many people OK this track before we hear it on our favorite radio stations.

First of all, there are two rappers in the studio - 2

Don’t forget the producer… - 1

And the recording engineer manning the boards – 1

And the random chick on background vocals – 1

With names like Young Blinga and J3W3L$, I have to assume that these jokers each have their own entourage in the studio with them – 10

Of course the producer has a couple of his homeboys with him – 2

After realizing that the track is hot fiya, J3W3L$ decided that he also wanted the song on his CD. That means that J3W3L$ and Young Blinga both have to play the song for:

The label’s marketing and promotion heads – 13 x2 = 26

The label president – 1 x2 = 2

The label chairman – 1 x2 = 2

The executive producer of the album – 1 x2 = 2

The management team heads – 5 x2 = 10

Young Blinga and J3W3L$ got mad hoes, but they only trust their lifetime bust it babies with their music – 1 x2 = 2

Matter of fact, nevermind. Let the hoes dance – 5 x2 = 10

Bodyguards – 2 x2 = 4

You know how club videos seem to have a million random people that all know the rapper? Well, it’s ‘cause they do. “That’s my peoples, fam.” - 50 x2 = 100

Moms was the only family member that wasn’t in the video; whenever the video drops, if you look closely you can see Pops doing a mean two-step in the background. Moms gets her own listening session. What mother wouldn’t be proud? 1 x2 = 2

And finally, the radio personalities, interns, and program directors at the radio station that gets first access to Young Blinga and J3W3L$’s new hit single “Shinin’ at Nite (Moon on my Chain) – 10

That’s a lot of fools. 187 fools! With any given song, there could be 187 fools, give or take a fool, who hear a song before it gets anywhere near the ears of the general audience. 187, the same number for homicide - career homicide. Not one of these fools has the power to intervene and say, “Hey. Young Blinga, man. Your song is some booty. Don’t do that to yourself, dawg.” So the next time you hear the whackness come out of your speakers, just think Damn! 187 Fools.

7 comments:

JusWritin' said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA....


Yo this joint is hilarious!!!!

1-8-7 on a low quality track.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious.

But up and down that list, everyone is getting paid off that track somehow: salary, production fee, promotion, residual, A&R, royalties, rent, cars, chains, Cris, or a new pair of Jordans.

And we get stuck listening to it for free.

JusWritin' said...

Haha... i want a new pair of J's to listen to that joint.

The STR Researcher said...

187 fools to make it happen and 187 million fools listening to it, it's f**king incredible. Another example of how you could get a million people to go along with ANYTHING!

Anonymous said...

Something, something, something...STACK THAT CHEESE.

Anonymous said...

lmao, loving it my brotha

K Storm said...

LMAO (iM LATE BUT STILL LAUGHING)